By: Keyla Ire
The model and entrepreneur reflects on the expectations we inherit, the confidence we build, and becoming more visible without giving everything away.
As an advocate for inclusive modeling, I am deeply passionate about who gets seen and about sharing the spotlight with stars in underrepresented communities. I’m also deeply interested in the behind-the-scenes work it takes for someone to step into the spotlight with confidence. A photograph can often capture a stoic expression without revealing the doubt, hesitation, and overall fear that came before it.
That distinction drew me to Mitchelle Daka’s story. With my involvement at GTIF Capital, I had the honor of interviewing the international model, entrepreneur, and Miss Universe Uganda titleholder, who described a challenge less visible than her accomplishments.
“My problem is always getting there and starting,” she explained. “Once I’m in it, then it’s easier for me.”
Making Room for Her Own Choices
As we spoke, Mitchelle described her upbringing. While growing up in a loving community, she said she sometimes agreed with older relatives and community members because it felt easier than challenging their expectations. What she said around them didn’t always reflect what she wanted for herself.
This made me pause to reflect… How much of ourselves do we set aside to stay acceptable to others?
Keeping the peace can be a deliberate choice. But when we repeatedly hold back an opinion or dismiss an ambition before exploring it, I think it is worth asking why. Are we honoring a value, or anticipating someone else’s disapproval?
How often do we shrink ourselves because we unconsciously learned that fitting in is how we survive? And how much does this shrinking influence our patterns later in life?
Rather than trying to change everyone’s perspective, she began considering the space she could create for herself, giving her more room to authentically be.
“I’m building my own little world, and people are entitled to their perspectives and their opinions,” she said. “But in my world, I get to pick what I want.”
Moving to a new environment helped. She described it as a reset: a chance to think differently, rebuild, and create conditions that felt more supportive.
Losing her best friend, in particular, gave those choices a new sense of urgency. She had thought about stepping out on her own but didn’t know how to begin. After the loss, waiting for things to automatically work themselves out no longer felt like enough.
She became more intentional about pursuing opportunities, even without knowing exactly where they would lead.
“Whether I get picked or not, I’m getting myself there somehow,” she recalled thinking.
Finding Her Voice Through Practice
As Mitchelle started becoming a more public figure, she described how speaking on camera and speaking in front of others still didn’t feel natural to her.
“Even when I started Miss Universe, speaking was the most difficult thing for me,” she recalled. “And then I started shooting these Grounded Woman episodes, and it was so stressful.”
Recording roughly four episodes in a day meant repeatedly working through what she wanted to say and finding a way to express it. Gradually, that effort made speaking feel more natural. By the time she attended the pageant’s live-in boot camp, she could recognize the difference.
“You could put me on the spot, and I could talk about anything,” she said.
The initial discomfort had not disappeared entirely, though.
“I don’t enjoy how it feels before I’m comfortable,” she explained. Once she finds her rhythm, speaking becomes easier, but reaching that point is not always automatic. “It takes a bit of working myself up to it.”
She recalled an arts event that brought together DJs and panel conversations, where they invited her to participate as a guest.
“I knew I could speak to people, but not a room,” she said. “So they invited me to be a guest, and they interviewed me there.”
Unexpectedly, she found herself very comfortable being interviewed. “I had so much fun,” she recalled, surprised because “I’m not a video camera kind of gal.”
The experience did not end with that appearance.
“And then they invited me, a few weeks later, to now host instead of be interviewed,” she said. “And I remember thinking to myself, ‘Okay, maybe you’re not so bad at this.’”
That invitation then helped her consider other public-speaking opportunities. She now had an experience to remember the next time she questioned whether she could hold a room.
Winning Miss Universe Uganda became another visible achievement, but her account highlights the preparation behind it; she worked on her speaking and public presence, and it wasn’t always natural to her.
Give Yourself Somewhere to Start
When asked what she would tell someone struggling with internalized doubt, shame, or fear, she said to accept yourself while being honest about what you want to change.
“This is who I am, and these are things that are a problem, and I can work on them,” she said, describing a conversation someone can start with themselves.
In her view, confidence means fully owning and acknowledging yourself, both your capabilities and your limitations. Recognizing something you need to work on does not mean you have to hide until you have resolved it. Nor does being yourself require everyone’s approval.
“You don’t have to be palatable to everyone, but that’s fine,” she said.
Her willingness to move forward also draws on a spiritual outlook. She described staying open to possibility, even when an experience doesn’t go as planned.
“Just trusting that there’s something bigger that’s rooting for you and working towards whatever it is your end goal is with you,” she explained.
What stays with me is how she makes room for both acceptance and effort. You can recognize something that needs practice without questioning everything you have to offer.
For anyone holding back, start there: What genuinely needs work, and what am I hiding because someone might disapprove?
Choose one manageable action. Record the video privately. Ask the question. Apply for the opportunity. Then notice what the experience tells you, including what you handled well and what you want to approach differently next time.
You do not have to feel certain of yourself to give yourself a chance. Take one step, and let what you learn give you something to stand on when doubt returns.
